111411-Hell of an ad for the Boy Scouts...

Read it, don't read it, I don't care...just needed to get some things off my chest.


In no particular order of chronology or importance...


Technology gets better every day.  That's fine.  But most of the time, all you need is a stick of gum, a pocket knife, and a smile (NOT MACGYVER).


1)  The Carrier Classic was worth the price of admission and then some.  Maybe you caught some of it.  If you did, I hope you a) caught the pregame where it was broken down how this game came to be and why it was so important b) caught the first 10 minutes of the game.  Not only was that the only time the out-manned Spartans were in the game, but watching them play before the sun went down was incredible.  The ship, the present military personnel, the backdrop of Mission Bay.  Absolutely awesome.  The mouths being off during the interviews slightly bugged me, but it didn't ruin the country/ bball celebration that was very well done.  UNC is just plain good, people.  Damn good.  I am not saying that I think they are losing any time soon, but if I had to pick on them, here is where I would go.  Their outside shooting, or lack of, I believe will lose them a few games.  True, they have plenty of athleticism and height inside to rebound all of the possible bricks that might come their way, but I think they are lacking a couple pure shooters.  Once again, I am picking.  They are freaking good.  Henson is going to be GOOD this year.  My oh my.  Michigan State?  They are another typical Michigan State team.  A couple players not playing their natural position, a bunch of athletes, well-coached, and they are going to get any rebound that is not directly to someone.  They will be dangerous, but their lack of a true point guard bothers me.  Good group of players though, and they have the coach to mold them into a very dangerous tourney team.  Just give Mr. Izzo a 7 or 8 regional ranking and try not to be surprised when he is in the Elite Eight.  Broken record.


2)  Final note on my last point.  Izzo is famous for scheduling an early tough schedule.  Uhhh.  Tomorrow?  Duke.  Wow.


3)  Tiger Woods didn't win in Australia this weekend.  I don't think this is the recent usual "he has lost it" thing.  He was focused the first two rounds, and from the highlights I saw, his swing looked good.  No real trouble in those first two days.  It was vintage Woods.  The third day, he had a very inconsistent round.  What I think overshadowed that round was that he rebounded for a very under control 67.  Seriously, people.  Everyone practice this fall and winter season, but we have not heard the last of El Tigre.


4)  Sometimes we talk about "trap" games.  I am writing this while watching the Packers/ Vikings game.  I have a feeling that this is NOT a trap game...just an shellacking in waiting.  This take was written with the Pack up 7-0 in the first quarter and getting ball back.


5)  I wrote last time about the Marlins pursuing Reyes and Buehrle.  Now, Pujols?  I guess since the other threesome didn't work as of yet, they might as well try baseball.  Keep watching this.  Combine this with arguably the 3 best managerial positions available, and this offseason has become kind of fun.


6)  Want to never complain out loud about being broke?  Go see 58: The Film.  For you non-church people, I admit it has some church stuff in it, but it is not overdone.  As far as a pure documentary, you will leave the showing feeling very humbled.


7)  20 years can change things.  Andre Ware won the Heisman in 1989 at the University of Houston.  Case Keenum is throwing 9 TD's in games and can't get a sniff.  Weird.


8)  Greg Jennings just caught a TD pass, which pretty much guarantees that I won my 5th straight fantasy football game.  Kind of anti-climatic though, with the news that Matt Schaub might be out for the year.  I am not interested in being Even Steven (YES.  I NOTICED my lack of Seinfeld references in the last few rants).  I would go throw a 20 dollar bill out the window, but it would be anti-climatic as I live on the 1st floor.


9)  Here is your useless fact to say in front of your friends at parties.  See?  I am here for you.  This is a stat that will make you sound good.  I actually didn't believe it at first.  Here you go.  Nebraska's win at Sad Valley was the Huskers' first ROAD win over a top 15 AP team since 1997.  What?  You think that is boring?  I beg to differ.  I think that stat is fancy.


10)  Is it me, or for the last 15 years or so, does Virginia Tech always lose in its first 3 games and then run the table?  They are 9-1.  I ALWAYS see that they are 9-1 at this point in the season.  They look pretty solid to run it again this year.  EXCEPT.  No, I won't go all UVA homer on you.  Just saying.  Virginia is hot, and we get them in Charlottesville.  Am I calling my shot?  No.  I have been in pain for a long time with my Cavaliers (our basketball team is a sleeper-watch out).  That being said.  I am just saying that it could be a TRAP game.  With my luck, and with his ties to PSU, London is going to win that game and then get calls from Penn State to be coach.  We finally get a solid coach, and now a program where he is going to be on the list, becomes vacant after like 10,000 years.  Sweet.


11)  The Big Ten has taken Paterno's name off the title trophy.  This is just going to get so much worse.  Sucks.  I heard that Sandusky's statement is online.  I don't know about you, but I can't read it yet.  I am personally not ready to read details about this shit.  This would be the absolutely (kind of odd parallel to this serious story coming-WARNING) polar opposite of me finding out from my buddy that Paris Hilton had sex tapes on the internet like 12 years ago.  I RAN to that site.  This one?  I might be one of the last people to read it.


12)  Whatever happens on any site's wire about Rex Ryan, I believe I will believe just about anything about that guy.  The story said that the NFL is taking a look at Rex cursing out a fan.  Sky is blue, and the grass is green, and you could tell me that he mooned the ref, streaked the field, assaulted a fan, and then jet packed out of the stadium.  My response would be "right on.  I see that happening."


13)  Does anyone else find it ironic that we hear stories all season about the Dodgers and bankruptcy/ change of ownership? Then, today, they sign Matt Kemp to a $160 million contract.  Just odd.


14)  Sky is blue, grass is green, and the Pack are up 17-0 now with 9 minutes left in 2nd qtr.  Side note.  Hey, Christian.  When you run a flee-flicker, you are not supposed to throw it in double coverage.  just a thought.  You should have pondered throwing it somewhere else.  Hardy har har.


15)  Kahne wins the NASCAR race.  Edwards keeps the lead.  No one turned right.  Just reporting it, people.


16)  Vick played with 2 broken ribs in the Arizona game.  Way to be tough, dog.  He he he.


17)  Knowshon Moreno is done for the year.  I am not saying that Tebow wasn't going to win any more games completing 2 passes for the game.  I am just saying this doesn't help.


18)  Mike Matheny is the new Cardinals manager.  I like the hire.  Unlike hockey, where the same 10 guys are managing 30 teams.  I SWEAR they are.  New blood.  Nice hire.  He has a championship, is a class act, and people will listen to him.  Now someone hire Ryne Sandberg and I will be happy.


19)  The Sabres lose Ryan Miller.  So, basically, the Sabres lose their team.  That dude has carried that team since...Dominick Hasek was good.


20)  Someone commented on my Tim Legler reference last time.  I know.  I make some very odd parallels.  For example, in this one, who else can fit Paris Hilton into a Penn State take?  This is stream of consciousness, people.  I Google as little as possible (mostly spelling), and come out with some weird shit. I am aware of this.  Just go with the flow.  I re-read the Legler reference.  I still like it.


21)  Kimbrel and Hellickson (I didn't look up spelling on either) are named the top rookies for MLB.  Evidently, a down year for rookies, because I almost had to look up both players.


22)  Joe Frazier's funeral was this weekend.  RIP man.  Warrior.


23)  You have Rocky.  You have Gladiator.  You have a few others.  300 was on after the Carrier Classic.  I almost left my apartment trying to walk through my first story wall.  It didn't work out, but just saying that I THOUGHT about it.


24)  I always get really excited when I get the Aflac trivia questions right.  This week was easy.  Herschel Walker.  The question?  Who beat John Elway for the Heisman.  Come on.  Easy one.


25)  STEPFAN?  That is the weirdest spelling for Stephan yet.  He is the running back for Stanford if you didn't know.  Speaking of the Cardinal, speed beat power...decisively.  By the way, there were at least 3 drops in the first 35 minutes by a Luck pass that could have changed the game.  Inexcusable.  Yes, I was proud I went on record on that game.  Did I think it was going to be that easy?  Absolutely not.  But, they won.  Going for 2 on their FIRST TD in the  first qtr?  Awesome.  Oregon is reminding me of FSU in 1998 when they got smoked by NC STATE in the second game and then ran the table.  Bad comparison in the way that NC State is much different then losing to LSU 40-27.  Good comparison in the way that the rule is "LOSE EARLY."  You just knew how the 2nd half was going to go.  Oregon is one of the best 2nd half adjustment teams in the FBS.  The fact that they were already winning was like picking the Pack against the Vikings in this game.  Done.  and Done.  BCS check in.  LSU.  Trap games.  At home Nov 25 against Arkansas.  OSU.  Trap game?  None.  I have said since OU lost to Texas Tech that they would smoke OSU at Bedlam.  I am sticking by it.  Boise loses because of a FG kicker again.  Talk about losing sleep at night.  Bama is just hanging there, and only have a Auburn game that is missing some guy named Cam Newton.  The BCS doesn't like me, because they know that if everyone wins out, there is no controversy.  I say we are going to have a HUGE debate.  LSU probably wins out, OSU gets beat, Bama wins out, and then we have the controversy of LSU, Bama, OU, and Oregon for the debate.  Playoff anyone?  Want to adopt my 6 team playoff system and have it settled correctly?  Yup.


26)  If I'm walking into a shit storm, I wanna know which way the wind is blowing.


27)   De'Anthony Thomas is downright scary.  Tabbed by Snoop Dogg the Black Mamba (take THAT, Kobe), that reception he had in the game was sick.  Also, sick. Joe Adams' kickoff return.  Check it out.  He plays for Arkansas.  B-A-D-A-S-S.


28)  Glad the Stanford/ Oregon game was called by Musburger and Herbstreit.  Great tandem.


29)  The halftime pre-game praying by the Nebraska and Penn State players was one of the oddest, saddest, and coolest things I have ever seen.


30)  Federer gets his 800th victory.  If it wasn't for him suddenly becoming Nadal's bitch, we might celebrate more.  You should have pulled a Tracy Austin and retired about 6 years ago.  Then, we would be just wondering how many titles you would have won instead of pondering if you are even the best player in OUR generation.


31)  Even though I am sad that it is my last issue and now I have to find a new magazine, I received the 125th Anniversary issue of Sporting News.  It will keep me busy for a while.  It has lists galore.  I love lists, and am passionate about SPORTS lists.  I just opened to TWO pages of the 152 page issue, and this is what is on the two pages.  Bird-Magic, Len Bias (I still have his autographed sneaker from basketball camp), Hand of God goal, Bill Buckner, The Drive, SMU's death penalty, Clemens 20k game, the '86 Bears, Nicklaus wins Masters, and...Gretzky.  Wow.


32)  Carson Palmer wins a game.  The Chargers must have just watched Seinfeld.  They are pulling a Bizarro Jerry.  They are supposed to be shitty early and good late, not vise versa.  HELLO!
Bad Bye!


33)  The Phils get Jonathan Papelbon.  In a related story, Ruben Amaro is presently at a strip club with Dan Snyder.  Metta World Peace is hopefully on the way.


34)  Bad call about Texas, but I still went 5-3 against the spread. Vandy, Mich St., Arkansas, Oregon, ND...wins.  Texas, Boise, Bama...losses.  I lost Bama by a point a half.


35)  24-0.  9:27 in third.  Damn, I wish I had money and wasn't retired.


36)  I just saw that Shaq ripped more people in his new book.  Can we wait for this list, can the person reporting it read the entire book first, and then just release all of the people he bitches AT ONCE?


37)  McQueary is put on "leave."  Shut down EVERYTHING.  Get rid of EVERYONE.  Clean house, people.  You want to heal first, of course.  However, if you want to get recruits, you have to show that you are serious about changing things up.  You might have to recruit into the Amish community for a few years, but you will be ok.


38)  I don't want a full length film, but can we make a mini movie about Wilson Ramos?  Just the gunfight scene.  No Oscars will be won, but it would be like a mini version of Man on Fire and Taken.


39)  US Soccer loses to France in a friendly.  Someone tell me when something good happens to US Soccer.  I have already said.  I am going to the 2014 World Cup.  I am GOING.  Can the US at least be a factor?  Jeez.


40)  Andre Johnson is out again.  I am sorry to my fraternity bro for approving that Johnson trade about 8 weeks ago.  Sorry, Scott.


41)  Sometimes legend just sneaks up on you.  Wow.  Coach K is about to become the all time leading winningest coach in D-1 history.  


42) NBA.  You guys are fucking idiots.  Seriously.


43)  Dos Santos KO's Velasquez for the UFC title.  In a side story, Kyle Busch did something also this week and was in the news.  I admit when I don't know something, and I have no jokes or commentary on either of these topics.


44)  Hey, Soonergirl.  Awesome comment on last blog.  Your T-shirt is in the mail. They still sell magic markers at stores.  Did anyone know that?


45)  Two of my favorite people in life love Seinfeld and sports.  One of them was my best man at my almost wedding in San Diego.  The other?  Someone I don't work with anymore.  RJ.   Bro, I hope you read this thing still.   The first?  He is coming to Denver in a couple weeks, and we will talk for hours about sports and Seinfeld and have people a few feet away from us no have any clue we are talking about them.  RJ?  We had one of my favorite conversations ever.  We were breaking down when I might meet a girl for a long term relationship.  We figured out that because of college football, NFL football, NBA basketball, college bball, hockey, etc., that my only window is from the end of June to late August.  Well, the reason I am bringing this up is because tomorrow starts the end of any possibility.  College bball.  Check out this lineup.  Florida/ OSU.  Duke/ MSU.  Belmont/ Memphis.  SD St./ Baylor.  GMU/ Virginia Tech.  UK/ KU.  Wow.  Along with others.  Don't call me.  I won't answer.


46)  I thought spies drank martinis.  Scotch.  Never less than 12 years old.  I am out.  Talk to you Thursday.  Peace.