110711-Sandra Bullock is not hot.

Read it, don't read it, I don't care...just needed to get some things off my chest.


In no particular order of chronology or importance...


Why is the rabbit unafraid?  Because he is smarter than the panther.


1)  The smart kids took down the country boys.  Northwestern knocks off Nebraska.  Northwestern is like the Big Ten version of Texas Tech. Maybe not once a year, but those kids are good for one huge victory in a game they have no right being in once every year or two.  Congrats, Northwestern.  My hatred of Nebraska is not geographic nor school related.  Totally ex- related.  That being said, you made me very happy, Northwestern.  I made a note when picking games last week how odd it was that I chose Nebraska as one of my locks.  Hell, if picking them as a betting consultant is all I have to do to have them lose, I will do it every week.  By the way, my only real loss this past week was Notre Dame.  I picked Bama only because I felt like I needed to make a call on the huge game of the week (I wouldn't have touched that thing with my money), and Nebraska was just plain stupid.  I won all of the others.


2)  This whole Penn State scandal really makes me sad.  That school prides itself on never having a violation and then this story comes out.  It involves his longtime friend and assistant coach, and child molestation.  This story also hits a very odd time as we all know Paterno is probably riding into the sunset very soon.  It reminds me a lot of Woody Hayes and Bob Knight.  Both had long tenures and then a scandal to see them out.  Paterno knew something.  Bottom line.  He will not be in trouble legally, but his past of making incidents smaller than they are in reality sometimes makes this a cloud over a very successful career.  This is a shame.


3)  It feels like just yesterday when we were talking about when Rick Neuheisel would be fired.  Here is a scary thought.  UCLA is controlling its own destiny.  It just beat Arizona State this past weekend, and can win its division.  Quite a turnaround combined with a really sad collection of teams over there.


4)  Did you see Curtis Painter throw it twice on one play on Sunday? Dude, if you have movie night tonight with your lady, you can watch Double Jeopardy and keep the theme going.


5)  The Atlanta Falcons, defending best record in the NFC, are a pretty quiet 5-3 right now.  The Packers are getting so much pub that Atlanta is just cruising along and making their move.  At least they won't have to worry about the pressure of winning at their crib this year.  They will be playing away for at least the last gate to the Super Bowl.


6)  FSU smoked Boston College at BC's crib.  So, either FSU finally looked like they were supposed to, or Boston College just sucks.  I think it was a hybrid of the two.  What has happened to BC football? They have ALREADY guaranteed they won't be bowl eligible this year.  Bad enough to have that happen, but in the ACC?  Doesn't say much for you.


7)  Steve Williams was busted delivering a racial slur against Tiger Woods this week at a caddy function.  Is he trying to get people to hate him and like Tiger Woods?  Dude.  Easy.  Everyone feels sorry for him when Tiger dumps him, and then he takes over the spotlight when Adam Scott wins a tournament with him, and now this.  Take it easy, bro.


8)  I respect that the guy is trying to improve overall as a quarterback, but I think Denard Robinson is going a little far on this.  Michigan lost again, and it seems obvious that he is actually trying to pass a little TOO much.  There was a red zone play where he sat in the pocket FOREVER.  A couple other times, it looked like he forced in some throws.  I see you working here, Denard.  You want to show that you are a complete QB.  Sometimes though, you have to just use that incredible athleticism you possess and make things happen.  By the way, bro, you are far from a complete QB and scouts know it, so just keep on running.


9)  There was a big story about Kyle Busch doing something wrong in a truck race and getting fined and suspended.  I was going to have a take on this, but then got distracted when the next story came on.  Mark Martin is still racing?  How old is that guy?  I thought he retired years ago.  Maybe he will stop racing when movies stop coming out where Sean Connery is pulling chicks that have to be sucking it up a little to do those kissing and sex scenes.  Both dudes are old.


10)  My paper has been pretty good over the last year or so at printing the plus/minus for the NHL.  For the most part, you get a true idea of the really efficient players in the league.  One name that caught my eye that surprised me.  Tyler Seguin, a high draft pick of Boston and in his 2nd year, is presently at +8.  Pretty impressive, kid.  Also, I have written that I don't write too much about the NHL until patterns start to occur and things settle down a bit.  Check out the goal scorers.  It is too early, as I had to scan down to #10-15 before seeing the guys who will be near the top at the end of the season.


11)  It is scary how many 1st Round QB's we will have this year in the NFL draft.  Luck, Barkley (if he goes), Jones, Griffin, Foles, and Tannehill.  If you are a team looking to get your next guy taking snaps, this is the year to pull the trigger.  If I step outside the love affair that everyone has with Luck, I think Jones and Foles are the best of that bunch.  Foles is the guy no one knows about, and Jones probably would win the Heisman this year when it is all said and done if the Sooners weren't using Blake Bell in their rendition of Chris Leak and Tim Tebow back in the day.  Josh Heupel is hurting Jones' chances.


12)  The Denver Post had a Nuggets/ Blazers game stats on the front page of their sports page last week.  A video game simulation.  I get it.  You are telling us that the NBA would be playing right now.  I GET it.  But front page?  You are clogging up better stories in that area.  Get with the program, guys.


13)  Dykstra never fought Canseco Saturday.  It didn't happen.  I know you would lose sleep if I didn't tell you that.


14)  Jeff Van Gundy is going to call some college basketball games.   Great.  Now I have to find out who is announcing the games when choosing what games I am going to watch each night?  I don't think Van Gundy is a horrible announcer.  I just can listen to him ok in the NBA because he used to be an NBA coach.  Calling college basketball requires a different touch, if you will.  I personally don't think his sound/ insight fits the college level at all.


15)  Score another one for the Madden curse.  Peyton Hillis just sat out his 3rd straight game and could miss 2 more.  


16)  OK.  I knew Peyton Manning was important to his team, but this drop off is ridiculous.  Did I think there would be a severe deduction in wins?  Sure.  Not THIS bad though.  Painter was hoping to pull a Matt Cassel, and is instead pulling a TB Bucs Steve Spurrier.  I am not explaining that joke.  Look it up.


17)  Matty Alou died last week.  I don't care how it happens, but can you imagine playing in the same outfield at the highest level of your sport on a pretty decent team with...your two brothers?  Amazing.  This makes the Staal brothers look like a loser story.


18)  Does anyone feeling like winning the Big East in football?  Seriously, guys.  If you get some free time, why don't you think about it?  Because it truly seems like no one wants it.  Louisville goes into WVA's crib and wins?  A) Louisville isn't very good B) WVA's crib is a pretty hard place to win at C) WVA has NFL talent on it.  Too busy daydreaming about whatever conference you plan on joining?


19)  During football, I saw a commercial for the Aluma Wallet.  It is a wallet that is hard covered.  Am I missing something?  Did I miss the memo?  I personally still put my wallet in my back pocket.  Is that not hip anymore?  How the hell would I sit down on that thing?  Confused.


20)  I find it odd that arguably three of the best jobs in all of baseball are all open at the same time.  Three jobs that some people would dream about having.  Wanted: managers for the Red Sox, Cardinals, and Cubs.  


21)  Brian Cashman says he has no interest in Pujols.  We know, Brian.  You have Mark Teixeira.  We know.  I just think it is funny that you took the time to let us know that.  Whether you have a guy at that position or not, EVERYONE has SOME interest in one of the best hitters we have ever seen.


22)  Houston Nutt has announced he will resign from Ole Miss at the end of the season.  I don't know what I am more confused about.  The fact of why everyone thinks he is a great head coach or why everyone thought Sandra Bullock was hot for the last ten years.  Dude, the last thing I remember you doing well was your 11-1 and 11-2 years at Murray State in the mid 90's and having Boise State go 5-6 when it switched to Division 1.  And Sandra Bullock is not hot and kind of irritating if you ask me.


23)  I will get paid on all of the deals I am selling now in January.  In a related story, Widespread Panic has announced shows in Denver and Aspen as their last shows before taking a well-deserved year off.
Hmmmm...


-What one man can do.  Another man can do.


24)  Tebow wins against the Raiders.  Whatever.  This will still not work out, people.  I don't care what you tell me.  This story is as easy to predict as the ending of a night where DeShawn Stephenson gets two bottles of Mad Dog and then says the rest of his night is "unplanned."


25)  Things are going to get fun in the next few weeks with baseball free agency signings.  I hear the Nats want Oswalt.  Sure, the guy could leave Philly, but I think you are making a mistake leaving that squad anytime in the next 2-3 years.  Hear that, Rollins?  That being said, I have already said in previous rants that I would put money on the Nationals to make the playoffs next year.  If I WAS going to go to an up and coming team, that is the one I would go to.


26)  The Blues hire Hitchcock.  If there ever was a sport that continued to hire retreads and didn't bring on chancy young up and coming coaches, it is hockey.  I feel like the same 10 guys have been coaching the same 30 or so teams for the last 20 years.


27)  Hey, fantasy people.  Andre Johnson just missed his 5th game and Miles Austin is going to be out 2-4 weeks.  So sorry for you all.  I personally stuck with my roster, have made hardly any changes, and am back from starting 4 guys on a bye week and being 1-4 to a 5-4 record.  Those back to back 10,1 picks of Turner and McCoy are looking pretty damn good these days.  Throw in Schaub, Welker, Jennings, Witten, Rackers, Bush, and the Pittsburgh Steeler defense, and I am A-ok.  I have to start another receiver that I really don't have, but Burress is worth 5 pts a game or so.  I'm all good.  Sweet butter...


28)  A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow


29)  I am hereby officially scared that the NBA won't have a season.  The team's updates we should be following are the Dallas Mavericks.  They are old.  They probably are ecstatic that this is happening.  The less they have to play before the playoffs, the better.
Greg Oden is probably happy too.  His 40 year old body and past injuries make a shorter season better for him.  I hear he is working out with Kevin Willis presently.


30)  The Twins have fired their GM Smith.  Really?  You give the guy no money to work with, he gets you good every couple years, and you get rid of him?  Bad call I think, personally.


31)  The only thing worse than watching my Steelers lose to the Ravens was enduring Cris Collingsworth talking for the three hours during the game. I tried the whole mute/turn on a radio feed, but the delays were different.  Does he hold his nose when he talks and purposely make stupid comments? 


32)  Quickly about the Ravens/ Steelers game.  I won't break the whole game down as I am breaking down the LSU/ BAMA game instead.  The bottom line is this.  You have your defense and 92 yards separating you between a win or loss with 2:34 left in the game at YOUR crib.  You allow them to take it from you.  Don't bitch about calls or anything else.  You let them TAKE it from you.  The only redeeming fact I have on this is this.  Fine.  Let them sweep you in the regular season.  True, you might lose a tiebreaker because of it.  Just be damn sure you get the game when the playoffs come around.  What a game.  What a rivalry.  And.  Every time I see Mike Tomlin react in ANY scenario, I just am so proud to call the Steelers my team.  He is such the perfect balance of football badass-ness and absolute class.  Damn, I would play for him ANY day.


33)  Yay.  College basketball is starting.  I can't wait for preseason tournaments, Big Mondays, Super Tuesdays, and the never named Wednesdays.  I LOVE being a college basketball junkie.  I just bought the Athlon preseason magazine.  I will literally read every single word of this large magazine.  Every word.  It will take me a while.  After I am done, I put it in a safe place until tourney time.  I am good at the tourney pools usually because I have devised a great system over the last couple years.  When tourney time comes around, I go back and look at the teams that were SUPPOSED to be good preseason, whether ranked or sleepers.  These are the teams that really are good, had some bad breaks, and everyone has forgotten about.  I then take a look at their draw.  From that, I usually can call the teams who "surprise" us.  A down note.  Sporting News magazine is evidently going to be discontinued.  I am lost.  I have read that mag for the last 15 years.  Sports Illustrated is just always too far behind what is going on, and ESPN mag is like the US Today...great for pictures, lists, and rankings, but useless for actual content.  I feel like Axel Rose.  Where do we go now?


34)  The SEC officially just announced Mizzou as its new member.  It just SOUNDS weird.  Freaking superconferences...


35)  I was asked today about my feelings on the BCS, playoffs, etc.  I won't get into it too much in depth as I already recognize its strengths and weaknesses, but, for the record, here you go.  I don't want to extend the season too much, but want to have a couple games that give us a true champion.  I say keep the BCS exactly as it is as a vehicle for the final matchups.  Take the top 6 teams in the BCS.  The top 2 teams get a bye, their reward.  Then, # 3 plays #6 and #4 plays #5.  Reseed, and have the top two teams matchup against the appropriate teams.  The winners then play for the title.  Teams #7 through whatever then play in the classic bowls.  They are meaningless now anyway.  Why not make them marginally more meaningless.


36)  I am in the minority.  I hear a lot of people saying that the LSU/ Bama game was boring.  I thought it was a GREAT game.  Sure, the offenses didn't explore the defenses that they might have, but that was out of respect.  It is easy to say that the offenses didn't gamble and try anything.  However, what if they did try something and they failed?  The final score was 9-6.  A defensive touchdown would have blown it wide open.  Respect for each defense was needed.  Did you miss the game?  Well, here you go...drive by drive...
BAMA:  They go 3 big play attempts in a row.  Good plan.  LSU's defense then tightens up and Bama misses their first field goal.
LSU:  Two decent pass plays,a run, a big 3rd and inches, and then they end up having a long 3rd down conversion, a no no against either of these defenses.  Punt
BAMA:  They had to start inside their 5.  Tough way to start against a defense like LSU's.  They got a long throw to get them some clearance.  Big 3rd and 1 at midfield that they get.  A great run by Trent Richardson for 6 yds and about 3 missed tackles.  Great call by the announcers on noticing Barrett Jones on an unbalanced line with Lacy in the background.  Lacy is Richardson's back up, is battling terf toe, but still averages 8 yards a carry.  They get stopped again.  Missed FG.
LSU:  Great field position on this drive.  Interesting note.  The crowd noise bothers both sides on this drive.  Bama changes defenses at the line more than any other team in the nation.  They have a hard time communicating because of the fans' noise.  An almost fumble and then Jarrett Lee's first interception of the year.
BAMA:  Nothing too much on this drive.  A great run by Richardson, a falldown sack, a throw away, and then a blocked FG.  Bama brought in their "short" field goal kicker this time.  He is not used to kicking long distances.  The trajectory of the kick showed this flaw.
LSU:  Jefferson is in.  A timeout due to crowd noise.  Jefferson sacked, a big hit on an incomplete, and another long 3rd down.  Punt
BAMA:  Nothing special at the beginning.  A big Richardson run, a big facemask on LSU, and then the second blown coverage on a Richardson reception out of the backfield (how are they not picking up a Heisman Trophy candidate coming out of the backfield?).  If you watch the replay of the game, watch the juke he does on that big reception.  The guy has MAD skills.  Made FG.
LSU:  1st major adjustment of game.  LSU goes to an option look with Jefferson.  They want Bama's LB's to run side to side on the field.  It works temporarily.  LSU gets a hurting call of 12 players on field.  LSU gets a long pass to the red zone with good ole Verne forgetting who is on offense and yelling "interception!"  CLASSIC.  Another option run, a HUGE holding call on Kirkpatrick, and Bama STILL holds them to a FG.
HALFTIME (interesting MVP.  LSU's punter has put Bama inside the 5 yard line twice thus far).  Saban is the best adjuster at halftime in the nation.  What will he do?
LSU:  Jefferson still is in.  He has a great run for a 1st down, but then on the next set of downs is almost sacked and then sacked.  They punt.
BAMA:  Run, incomplete, incomplete, punt.
LSU:  Interception by Bama.  However, instead of being inside the 10 yard line, Bama gets caught on the interception for blocking in the back.  Interesting.  Watch the reply.  There were actually TWO blocks in the back.
BAMA:  Long TD attempt, a solid Maze reception.  This all adds up to another FG.  6-3
LSU:  1st down.  1st down.  Penalty.  Jefferson seems to run wrong way on a QB sneak.  They do another option, which Saban's defense reads perfectly.  Adjustment.  Long 3rd down (14).  Punt.
BAMA:  Big pass play to Hanks.  Draw for nothing (why are they not trying that Richardson pass play that is two for two?  Three for three if you include Macy)  They have to burn a TO to save penalty.  Lacy gets a dump off very similar to the Richardson plays.  THANK YOU.  LSU gets an interception on a throw that makes Tim Tebow look like Jeff George or John Elway. INT.  Side note, Barrett Jones goes to the locker room.  
LSU:  They get inside the 20 on this drive.  On a big 3rd and 1, Bama holds.  FG.
BAMA:  Richardson brings out the kickoff from the endzone to the 24.  Maze has a bug reception, an awesome Richardson run, a wildcat play where they miss a wide open RB, and then a controversial INT right at the goal line.  I personally thought the receiver was down before the DB stole the ball from him.  Big chance missed.
LSU:  Three and out.  Punt.  A 72 yard punt that goes over a hurt Maze.  No way Maze should have been in for that play.  Bad call, Saban.
BAMA:  Nice Trent run to start out.  Maze returns for a 1st down reception.  Taylor makes a Tecmo Bowl like Howie Long tackle over the line on a snap (the one where you can always sack the QB by diving forward and pressing a coded order of buttons...yes, that sounded like a loser).  Another Richardson dump off pass which gets 18 of the 19 yards they needed.  Punt.
LSU:  HUGE flag against LSU.  Big first pass, a stopped run play, a big Jefferson run, and then  Bama stop.  Punt.  One minute left.
BAMA:  Saban obviously is happy with OT.  I might have tried something since you are at home, but the way these defenses have played, probably a good call.  Plays it safe.  
OVERTIME
BAMA:  PENALTY!  Too many men on the field.  Incomplete pass where he totally had him open.  3rd down and 15.  They don't get it.  Missed 52 yard goal.
LSU:  Ford steps out at 7 in a great play, but they get it centered and make the field goal.
I think it was a great game.
NOTES:
-I personally missed Brent and Kirk calling this game.  It has nothing to do with my man-crush on Kirk.
-Bama's fans were having a Mardi Gras like celebration 3 hours before kickoff...to welcome the team off the team bus.  Wow.
-I went in this game wanting Boise State or Stanford to get in the equation.  After the game, I think I want to see this dance again.
-Great schools get all of the best recruits.  I know it is not the highest on their priority list, but WHY DON'T GREAT SCHOOLS HAVE GREAT KICKERS?  Every year, there are teams that are the best at every position...and then have a walk-on kicking for them.  I don't get it.  Too many close games need a solid kicker.


37.  We are all put to the test.  But it never comes in the form or at the point we would prefer it, does it?


38.  That's it, people.  Until Thursday.  In the words of my favorite second string QB who apparently is third string in reality, now I'm done.